And a few other things I neglected to mention. Kyle had his first baseball game last Saturday & his team won. The summer league baseball they have here has the upper middle schoolers (7th & 8th) on teams with high school boys. It's quite cool, but more like a scrimmage type league - they play each other (3 teams for our town) & one other team. Kyle is playing with the big boys now!
For now, my comp has calmed down, but still isn't right. I don't want to shut down, yet, as there are things I want to get done before I do that. I want to figure out how to network our 2 computers on our router (haven't done that & had the router for a long time) just so I can transfer or copy files to the other comp. I hope that's what networking can do. As far as that is concerned, I am clueless. The only files I am truly concerned about are my pictures. I would lose soooooo much memories & history if I crashed for good. At the very least, I am getting an external HD tomorrow.
Comic relief? Well, I was down in Dock man's hole watching baseball with him & Dew came down. I can't remember what prompted this reaction (Dock man musta said something Dew found amusingly sarcastic - we're all sarcastic), but this is what happened:
Dew: If you do that, I'll call you the "F" word. (this is where cussing gets me & Dock in a bit of a pickle, and Dock's worse!!)
Dock: Huh? What "F" word? I don't know any "F" word.
Dew: The "F" word, you know - the real "F" word.
Dock: What word are you talking about? (I am begininng to grin deeply, have to turn away)
Dew: It's the bad word that starts with an "F".
Dock: Huh? Really, what word are you talking about? Tell me what it is.
Dew: (with great enthusiasm & laughter teeming in his voice) I can't say THAT! It's the "F" word! It starts Ffffff - uuuuuu (he's sounding the letters out s-l-o-w-l-y).
Dock: What is the word? Ffff - uuuu (sounding it out, too), never heard it.
(I want to stop Dock because I know this is so wrong, but I don't because I'm nearly giggling. I couldn't speak at the time)
Dew: I can't SAY IT! I'll get in trouble! It says Fff - uuuu, you know.
Dock: But I don't know, you have to tell me! Ff - uu...fun?
Dew: Nooooo! That's not it - it's a BAD word. A word I'm not supposed to say. Ffff - uuuuu.
Dock: If it's not fun, what is it?
Dew: I will get in sooo much trouble!
Dock: No, you won't get in trouble.
(as Dew talks about trouble, he looks directly at me. I have to concede & try not to smile)
Me: No, you won't this time! But since dad wants to know what word you want to call him, I will let it go. Just don't. say it. again.
Dew: It's F - u - c - k (he spelled it this time).
Dock: What? I still don't know that word. (he really wants him to say it)
Dew: Agggh! (he's happily exasperated and smiling sheepishly, I'm sure because he can't believe we are going to let him say it) F - u - c - k (spelling again).
Dock: Just say it, cause I don't have any idea what word you are talking about!
Dew: It sounds like Ffff-uuu-ccckkk (ever so s-l-o-w-l-y!!)
Dock: Ffff-uuu-ccckkk? Huh? (same slowness here)
Dew: (a bit of a boy squawky voice) Yeah!!
Then, he says it so quiet & in a pig like squeal. About 5 times.
Dock: That word? You want to call me that word? If you call me that, you better say it like a man & not in that squealy voice.
Dew said it a few more times, the same voice & couldn't stop laughing! Both Dock man & I were cracking up pretty good, too. Afterwards, of course we told him he wasn't allowed to say it until he was older. What's really odd about this - the only thing I've ever done is explain to them all that cussing is for grown ups - just like beer, cigarettes (I also tell them cigs suck & I hope they never start & the "whys" of this) & driving. It's always been enough to keep them from saying the words I use everyday. He feared saying it like it was uber taboo. Good! That's all I can say - he won't say it around us (unless Dock man urges him too, again! I don't think so, though). That it's good he fears the bad words.
I am awful, I know. Many of us have done this, so I know I'm not alone. Good laughter after a shitty day, even if it's laughter in an uncouth manner.
Showing posts with label funny stuff. Show all posts
Showing posts with label funny stuff. Show all posts
Wednesday, June 4, 2008
Saturday, April 26, 2008
She's so unusual
Looking at that word..unusual...looks odd to me. Maybe I just never really took a good look before.
My daughter is 4. She is my only girl after 3 boys, so I feel rather lucky to be having the experience of a girl. There are quite a few quirky things about her. The first and sometimes most alarming is her gas factor. Yes, she has gas like her father. If she took anything from him genetically, I think that's the big one (can gas be passed on that way? me thinks it's possible). From birth this child has been gassy. Not the usual painful infant gas (it never seemed to bother her much in that way), but audible farts, no joke. Before her, I'd never really heard an infant fart. We can see it & sense it, as mothers, but never did I hear until Maia. The fartiest baby I ever knew & now, the fartiest girl I know. She hasn't ever been shy about it and most often we all get a good laugh from it. Not, at least, until last summer. We were out to dinner and she farted. Both my hub & I looked at each other grinning, and she was laughing (so were the boys). Then I explained to her that farting was something we did in private. After that moment, each public fart, if she can't hold it, has been her mortification. She will cry, occasionally and I can't help but wonder if I scarred the girl. Don't get me wrong, she'd be much more mortified if she learnt that lesson the hard way later in her young life, but still...
The other day (last week) we had Polish sausage for dinner. She loves that - it's one of the few things she'll always eat in her picky stage. She had her fill & the next day...OH MY GOD! The gas was the smelliest! I swear it came from her dad & not her (and what is it with the men enjoying their "mixture", or is mine the only one who relishes it?). She was sitting on the couch at one point & the smell hit her bad, after she giggled the noise away. She almost cried because she thought it smelled so bad! I was laughing because it was sweetly sad & funny at the same time. Keep in mind, she was quite sleepy at the time and we all know most girls are a little more sensitive when they're sleepy (hell, all little ones are). Aside from the farting, she is mostly girly. She loves to have her nails painted, wear her jewelry & her dresses, plays with her Barbies, Littlest Pets, Ponies and stuffed animals. This year for her birthday, we asked her what she wanted. She said Transformers & Ninja Turtles... Yeah. My mom actually got her the mini Leonardo set with the bad guy, Hun. She was pleased as punch, but now Andy claims it's his Leo if he can't find his own. Heh. She doesn't care much if Andy makes his claim - she can just grab his cars & he's giving Leo back to her.
They do often say the funniest things and here I am talking about some of the yuckiest...more. She put her finger in her nose the other day & said she could "feel her brain". Of course I got a laugh out of it & explained reality to her. I shared it with my hub & her older brother, Kyle, among a few others. It's cute the things they say. Tonight, we were in the garage (I was smoking there because it was raining - I hate when they must follow, the whole reason I go in there is so they don't have to be around it) and she picks her nose & says she's touching her brain. Another giggle from me & her alike. Her favorite joke is:
"Knock, knock?
Who's there?
Banana.
Banana who?
Banana that got flushed down the toilet."
I always play the gimme five thing with her, you know - gimme five, up high, down low, too slow? She & Andy LOVE that game, especially if they can hit my hand. I added an element to it, the "in the hole" element and then "thanks for cleaning out my toilet bowl". The hoots of laughter I got after that one were awesome! Well, she made up her own. Gimme five, up high, down low, fire in the hole! Whenever I hear that, I think of Stella from Over the Hedge - so I'm thinking she's thinking stinky stuff.
Yeah, she's so unusual.
My daughter is 4. She is my only girl after 3 boys, so I feel rather lucky to be having the experience of a girl. There are quite a few quirky things about her. The first and sometimes most alarming is her gas factor. Yes, she has gas like her father. If she took anything from him genetically, I think that's the big one (can gas be passed on that way? me thinks it's possible). From birth this child has been gassy. Not the usual painful infant gas (it never seemed to bother her much in that way), but audible farts, no joke. Before her, I'd never really heard an infant fart. We can see it & sense it, as mothers, but never did I hear until Maia. The fartiest baby I ever knew & now, the fartiest girl I know. She hasn't ever been shy about it and most often we all get a good laugh from it. Not, at least, until last summer. We were out to dinner and she farted. Both my hub & I looked at each other grinning, and she was laughing (so were the boys). Then I explained to her that farting was something we did in private. After that moment, each public fart, if she can't hold it, has been her mortification. She will cry, occasionally and I can't help but wonder if I scarred the girl. Don't get me wrong, she'd be much more mortified if she learnt that lesson the hard way later in her young life, but still...
The other day (last week) we had Polish sausage for dinner. She loves that - it's one of the few things she'll always eat in her picky stage. She had her fill & the next day...OH MY GOD! The gas was the smelliest! I swear it came from her dad & not her (and what is it with the men enjoying their "mixture", or is mine the only one who relishes it?). She was sitting on the couch at one point & the smell hit her bad, after she giggled the noise away. She almost cried because she thought it smelled so bad! I was laughing because it was sweetly sad & funny at the same time. Keep in mind, she was quite sleepy at the time and we all know most girls are a little more sensitive when they're sleepy (hell, all little ones are). Aside from the farting, she is mostly girly. She loves to have her nails painted, wear her jewelry & her dresses, plays with her Barbies, Littlest Pets, Ponies and stuffed animals. This year for her birthday, we asked her what she wanted. She said Transformers & Ninja Turtles... Yeah. My mom actually got her the mini Leonardo set with the bad guy, Hun. She was pleased as punch, but now Andy claims it's his Leo if he can't find his own. Heh. She doesn't care much if Andy makes his claim - she can just grab his cars & he's giving Leo back to her.
They do often say the funniest things and here I am talking about some of the yuckiest...more. She put her finger in her nose the other day & said she could "feel her brain". Of course I got a laugh out of it & explained reality to her. I shared it with my hub & her older brother, Kyle, among a few others. It's cute the things they say. Tonight, we were in the garage (I was smoking there because it was raining - I hate when they must follow, the whole reason I go in there is so they don't have to be around it) and she picks her nose & says she's touching her brain. Another giggle from me & her alike. Her favorite joke is:
"Knock, knock?
Who's there?
Banana.
Banana who?
Banana that got flushed down the toilet."
I always play the gimme five thing with her, you know - gimme five, up high, down low, too slow? She & Andy LOVE that game, especially if they can hit my hand. I added an element to it, the "in the hole" element and then "thanks for cleaning out my toilet bowl". The hoots of laughter I got after that one were awesome! Well, she made up her own. Gimme five, up high, down low, fire in the hole! Whenever I hear that, I think of Stella from Over the Hedge - so I'm thinking she's thinking stinky stuff.
Yeah, she's so unusual.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)
LinkWithin
