This piece is directly related to my recent post One Life for Eight Others. Some thoughts about what might happen to a serial killer upon and after death. I have a lot more in my head & I will see how it all plays out.
The last day on earth. God didn't find me in here, if there is one. So many of these assholes are fased by the Word and it sickens me. What the fuck kind of God creates a man like me? One who thrives on seeing death at the moment of it? One who fantasizes about making them suffer? One who loves killing?
All the other murderous souls have sought forgiveness. They find it, but not within themselves. Because like I know, they know too, it doesn't matter because we are all going to die. Why would I want to forgive something I love? Maybe I'm the only one, but I don't think so. I just think I'm the only one who's honest about it. They are all wanting the fantasy of a heaven. In my right mind, I can't fathom that anyone who's done the things I've done could find a place where all is good. The only good I know is what I've done & I don't think heaven is a killing place.
"Roberts," called the guard. "It's time for your menu."
"Yeah, I got it." I slid the paper across the opening in the door. They actually gave me a pen earlier. I wrote a little more than my menu.
I knew I only had so many hours left. I walked back over to the bench & laid down. I closed my eyes. There she was. I could see her so vividly and she was the end of me. I was used to the aversion of the gaze. I was used to the fear and the disgust and the pleading in their eyes, if I could catch a glimpse. But, oh ho, she was different. I think that's why she lived.
Her eyes lied to me. They looked straight into mine & lied. I saw a tinge of fear, the baby blues looked almost serene, and that told me she saw love. The calmness made me untie her hands. She wrapped them around me. I could feel her nails braise my skin lightly and I was looking, locked into her stare. I didn't know I'd let her go & in the moment, I was the one confused. I wanted what she was givin' so badly. She was so smart. She did deserve to live but if I saw her today, I'd rip her head clean from her body.
I got up & walked to look through the wire in the small window. It was 4:36, only a few more hours before it would all be over.
Gallant was watching the inmate with intensity. He wondered what the guy was going through. Gallant didn't feel sorry for him, not even a little. After having several conversations, because there wasn't much else to do on death row, he realized this guy was a true monster. Without a heart, without a soul - Jess Roberts was on his way to the only place he belonged, hell.
Gallant saw Jess look at the time. It was so hard for him not to think of what the inmate might be thinking. Was Jess afraid to die? He sure didn't seem like it. This was only the second lethal Gallant would be guarding. The other experience was vastly different, the inmate at the time, Freddie Claussen, was utterly shaken & remorseful for his acts. Gallant knows from his experience that most of them are only sorry for getting caught, sorry for themselves. Claussen seemed to be truly sorry for what he did and while he was a total basket case walking the mile, he was accepting of what was coming to him.
Roberts didn't look like a monster. He didn't have evil, beady black eyes like many of them did. He didn't have a spiked tail growing out of his ass or horns growing from his head, but Gallant thought he should have both. He was of medium build, a little on the tall side, not unassuming because he had boyish good looks. Roberts had a face with soft features & wide light brown eyes. Gallant knew that women fell for men like this and it was telling because of the amount of letters Jess Roberts had gotten in Gallant's short 4 year tenure on Death Row, all from women, all with photos and dribble of love.
Gallant was holding on to one last letter. It might be one of those things that enrages an inmate who is about to die. Gallant wanted everyone to be prepared for it. The woman who sent the letter asked that Gallant wait til the latest possible moment to give it to Roberts.
ConCrit is encouraged. I'd like to know what you see when you read, what does it make you feel like?
Friday, August 5, 2011
Monday, August 1, 2011
Monday Listicles - My Favorite Sci-fi
Head on over to The Good Life to add your own fun list.
This week, I'm going with some of my all time favorite Science Fiction shows, most of them are recent. I didn't have a hankerin' for anything Sci-fi until 11 grade. I decided to take, of all types of classes, a Science Fiction class. I figured it would be cake & I needed a good elective. I didn't expect that I would excel in & enjoy that class. The first book I read for an assignment was The Martian Chronicles by Ray Bradbury. While I don't remember it like I should, I do remember being enthralled by the stories within it. I aced several reports & it put my GPA in good standing for that first quarter of school. I dropped out shortly thereafter, but went to another school instead.
Most of these are relatively new shows. I know there are plenty of old shows that deserve some cred here, but I'm just wanting to tell you about my recent faves.
In no particular favorite order:
1. The X Files - no need to explain this one. Fox Mulder was enough reason to watch. I miss the abduction tales, the weird happenings & the Smoking Man.
2. The Outer Limits the one revised by Showtime in the early 90s. The original is good, too, just not one of my faves.
3. Haven - a newer show, only in it's second season, but so cool! It's based on Stephen King's short The Colorado Kid. The people in Haven suffer from "troubles". One particular woman was a taxidermist. She was angry for some reason or another (can't remember why) and all of her "clients" were coming back to life & killing people. The sheriff (now, cause his dad died & was the sheriff before) has no sense of touch, can't feel anything. He's one of the troubled. Emily Rose (from John from Cincinnati - another oddball show that only lasted one season - but I liked it) is FBI agent (or something) Audrey Parker who shares the memories of the real FBI agent Audrey Parker whom we met for the first time at the end of last season.
4. Warehouse 13 - another new show - maybe 2nd or 3rd season, it is a warehouse that safely houses artifacts from history that have special attributions, or dangerous powers. It's so much fun!! The agents work for a curious woman called Mrs. Frederic. She controls the warehouse & oversees the agents. Lots of humor in the show.
5. Stargate SG-1 - the series on Showtime before it was bought by Scy-fy. The episodes with Richard Dean Anderson were the best episodes. Once the original cast was broken up, I didn't watch. Most of the original cast came back, but it was hard for me to get back into it without the boss.
6. Alphas - another new show on Scyfy. It just premiered a few weeks ago & I love it! It's about "special" people. I never watched Heroes, couldn't wrap my head around it - but this show may be along the same lines. The Alphas are special in some way or another. One of the main characters has heightened senses, she can smell, feel & see things that are long gone. Another main character has super human strength, yet another has the ability to "push" people, manipulate minds.
7. Torchwood - Miracle Day - brand spankin new to Starz. I fell in love with this show right away, too. One day, they call it Miracle Day, people just stop dying. People who should be dead can't die, no one can die. Basically all of humanity has become immortal. In the last episode a woman who was speaking out against the "dead" was crushed in a car crusher. The very end of the episode saw her eye peeking from behind bent metal. Torchwood is a group of people who are trying to figure out what or who is behind Miracle Day & how to get people to die again.
8. Sliders - OMG! Jerry O'Connell after so many years (totally only remembered him from Stand By Me). I used to love this show & was sad to see it end too soon. I love time travel stuff, but not Dr. Who.
9. Fringe - amazing newer show, in the same vein as the X-Files with mysterious creatures & alien interference. It's also multi-dimensional. There have been some outstanding episodes that are ripe with creativity & neat-o tv programming, like stuff you only expect to see in movies.
10. Millenium - not entirely sure if this would qualify, but the lead character was an FBI profiler had the ability to get into the minds of serial killers & liaisoned with a mysterious group that was focused on the end of the world, the Millenium Group. It only lasted 3 short seasons. I was a fan.
This week, I'm going with some of my all time favorite Science Fiction shows, most of them are recent. I didn't have a hankerin' for anything Sci-fi until 11 grade. I decided to take, of all types of classes, a Science Fiction class. I figured it would be cake & I needed a good elective. I didn't expect that I would excel in & enjoy that class. The first book I read for an assignment was The Martian Chronicles by Ray Bradbury. While I don't remember it like I should, I do remember being enthralled by the stories within it. I aced several reports & it put my GPA in good standing for that first quarter of school. I dropped out shortly thereafter, but went to another school instead.
Most of these are relatively new shows. I know there are plenty of old shows that deserve some cred here, but I'm just wanting to tell you about my recent faves.
In no particular favorite order:
1. The X Files - no need to explain this one. Fox Mulder was enough reason to watch. I miss the abduction tales, the weird happenings & the Smoking Man.
2. The Outer Limits the one revised by Showtime in the early 90s. The original is good, too, just not one of my faves.
3. Haven - a newer show, only in it's second season, but so cool! It's based on Stephen King's short The Colorado Kid. The people in Haven suffer from "troubles". One particular woman was a taxidermist. She was angry for some reason or another (can't remember why) and all of her "clients" were coming back to life & killing people. The sheriff (now, cause his dad died & was the sheriff before) has no sense of touch, can't feel anything. He's one of the troubled. Emily Rose (from John from Cincinnati - another oddball show that only lasted one season - but I liked it) is FBI agent (or something) Audrey Parker who shares the memories of the real FBI agent Audrey Parker whom we met for the first time at the end of last season.
4. Warehouse 13 - another new show - maybe 2nd or 3rd season, it is a warehouse that safely houses artifacts from history that have special attributions, or dangerous powers. It's so much fun!! The agents work for a curious woman called Mrs. Frederic. She controls the warehouse & oversees the agents. Lots of humor in the show.
5. Stargate SG-1 - the series on Showtime before it was bought by Scy-fy. The episodes with Richard Dean Anderson were the best episodes. Once the original cast was broken up, I didn't watch. Most of the original cast came back, but it was hard for me to get back into it without the boss.
6. Alphas - another new show on Scyfy. It just premiered a few weeks ago & I love it! It's about "special" people. I never watched Heroes, couldn't wrap my head around it - but this show may be along the same lines. The Alphas are special in some way or another. One of the main characters has heightened senses, she can smell, feel & see things that are long gone. Another main character has super human strength, yet another has the ability to "push" people, manipulate minds.
7. Torchwood - Miracle Day - brand spankin new to Starz. I fell in love with this show right away, too. One day, they call it Miracle Day, people just stop dying. People who should be dead can't die, no one can die. Basically all of humanity has become immortal. In the last episode a woman who was speaking out against the "dead" was crushed in a car crusher. The very end of the episode saw her eye peeking from behind bent metal. Torchwood is a group of people who are trying to figure out what or who is behind Miracle Day & how to get people to die again.
8. Sliders - OMG! Jerry O'Connell after so many years (totally only remembered him from Stand By Me). I used to love this show & was sad to see it end too soon. I love time travel stuff, but not Dr. Who.
9. Fringe - amazing newer show, in the same vein as the X-Files with mysterious creatures & alien interference. It's also multi-dimensional. There have been some outstanding episodes that are ripe with creativity & neat-o tv programming, like stuff you only expect to see in movies.
10. Millenium - not entirely sure if this would qualify, but the lead character was an FBI profiler had the ability to get into the minds of serial killers & liaisoned with a mysterious group that was focused on the end of the world, the Millenium Group. It only lasted 3 short seasons. I was a fan.
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